April 17- Your Choice Made

Another one lost today
Left in the side of the road
Without the strength to move on
Or maybe she did it on purpose.

Maybe she wanted to leave me
And the rest of us
Alone here, walking.

I told her that I would be her help
I would help her like I had
Always wanted someone to help me
When the worst thing in my life happened

I wanted to be strong for her
To be with her
Yet she did not let me in
Did not even talk to me
Maybe I was mistaken with
What I thought we had

Was I?
Was I wrong?
We have to pick up the pieces
Now. The ones you left
And move on
Keep going the journey
Even though the steps away from you
Become harder.

Yet, in the end it was the choice you made
And we both have to live with it.

J.R

April 16- Still Breathing

You think that this  right

but I swear to you

I will break you heart

I will hurt you

 

I am nothing anymore

I have a darkness that hurts me

and those around me

 

I have drawn away from those close to me

Maybe I was never close to them before.

There is no way out.  I will not hang on anymore

I will let go

of you

 

I have been stuck here,

I have fallen into this silence

And don’t you come for me.

Because you will not make it out here

without me hurting you

Because I will break your heart

 

It is all I have ever know to do

I cannot stop what I know to be true.

I am cold as can be

But be assured that I am still breathing

Even if it is the most shallow I have

ever breathed before.

I am still

breathing.

 

J.R

April 16-Smothered In Regret

Smothered In Regret

by Daniel White

 

I sit here along with memories

Each one filled with hurt and regret

I can feel them relive within me

While I am alone and upset

 

Those lost hopes have paved

A path I can no longer crave

These lost and broken dreams

Are all that live inside of me

I wish I could find release

 

I lie to myself once more

Trying to justify my actions

And I am still left out and ignored

When I choose to seek your reaction

 

The fall air is cool

And I am still a lonely fool

These lost hopes

Are all I know

And I cannot find escape

There is never escape

 

I am smothered by all of these years

Which continue to hold my darkest fears

Forever damned by the mistakes I can’t take back

Always bound by me bittersweet past

 

If only I could move forward

And not replay the regret which smothers me

Instead I give up and move towards

My loneliness that rests eternally

 

So, I continue to sit here

And think about each memory

Filled with regret and fear

If only I could escape  from me

There is never any release

April 15- We Let It Happen

You let it happen to me

You made me believe in us

Then you broke me.

You took away the happiness I had with

the only one I had ever cared about.

You let that happen to me

 

Forget it.  I know what it was like.

I know you could have had a choice

 

I let it happen to you

I let you go and could not stop it

I let you believe that I was your rock

That I would be there for you

That I would not let you be drowned by life

I let you die

I let it happen to you

 

Now I just want to forget the

promises that we broke

The idea of us being together forever

It is keeping me locked in place

 

I can’t forget it

I love it too much

I love you too much.

I needed you to be here for me

I needed to be your rock

I needed your love.

I hate you for leaving

I hate me, for letting you die.

 

J.R

April 15-New Life

New Life

by Daniel White

 

Moving forward, only to get nowhere

Thinking positive, never to have real peace of mind

Falling in love, to watch it all disappear

Living now, only to one day collapse and die

 

Where is my live, now that I have nothing

I am consumed by empty, bitter thoughts

Resting and waiting, for death that will be something

An appropriate ending, which I’ve always sought

 

Where is that new life

That I’ve forever dreamed of

A life that was meant to be

Instead I’m neglected and starved

While no new life waits for me

 

Pushing ahead, only to get pulled back down

Doing the right thing, never getting the credit I deserve

Extending my hand, to those who slap is around

Trying to avoid pain, only to end up getting hurt

 

My life is darker than the evening winter sky

Downward my courage drops and no longer exists

To put a concluding finish to this is worth a try

A desperate notion that I can no longer resist

 

“Hold on and wait for a new life,”  they say

I’ve been holding on for long enough

Now I know that life was never meant to be

I no longer have a reason to be strong

As the life I have now is all I will ever see

 

April 14-The Kindness Of Light

There once was a journey I took with a star

one of pure light, whose reputation was not known to many

Her beauty shone bright through the land

I walked and learned for what she had to offer

She was wise, she had lived long

 

She would help grow the plants in the ground

with the kindness of her glow

Selfless and stable.

She told me,

“You can do amazing things

if you would only let your light shine”

 

She showed me that you have to give in order

to receive what you want, or anything that is good.

 

There was a great evil coming

for the planet, for me, and those around me

 

Star knew what had to be done.

She flew into the sky to the dark evil.

She become still forever in the sky

never to return to us.

Yet, she did it for our lives

for us.  For me.

We will never speak again but I know

she was always there for me

 

And that she would want me to,

like her, let my light shine.

 

J.R

April 14-Without

Without

by Daniel White

 

If nothing has taken place before

I doubt if anything will occur now

My emotions step out the door

Leaving me without

 

Without the peaceful quietness

Of a look at wholesome serenity

I have dealt with the loudness

That remains before me

 

I look into the careless lies

That have taken me off track

When doubt comes as a surprise

I’ll never find my way back

Find my way back